No matter how much it may feel otherwise at times, where there is love, there can be no permanent loss. Not in suffering; not even in death. If someone comes into your life for a long time or only a short while, there will come a time when you or they will have to leave. It doesn't matter how or why they leave. They have to leave because they have played the role they were meant to play in your life and now that role has been fulfilled. It was meant to be that they were present when they were present. That time was a gift. Treat it as such. Gifts are not rights. They are moments of grace. When the time comes that they have to leave, open your arms and release them just as you opened your heart to receive them. Both are choices. The love that was there is never lost because love is never lost.
Lessons are simply learned and life moves on to the next level. How well we learned that lesson is determined by whether the next lesson is exactly the same as the last one. There will be another lesson, to be sure. Hopefully it will be one that builds on the last, rather than one that repeats it. However, even if you have to repeat a lesson, be grateful for the second chance. Embrace it as part of life and part of why we are here. We are all here on this earth to learn to love. Even when life hands us a million reasons not to love.
We are all of us are here to teach about love, one way or another. Some of us teach those lessons by being the embodiment of love. Some of us teach those lessons by being the challenge to love. None of us is perfect, so generally we are both at different times in our lives. We become love's impediment and life's challenge when we lose sight of the fact that we ARE love. We become the embodiment when we remember to relax into love as a way of being.
No matter what, embrace the lesson love is trying to teach you. Release the grief when you are able, so you can embrace the love that is the true gift, the true lesson. That love is not lost, if the lesson is learned, no matter how much the situation has changed. If you keep your heart open, it is always real, and new lessons on love will come into your life. Love will always flow into your life. The only way you can dam the flow of love into your life is by choosing to close your heart to it through unforegiveness or regret (which is unforgiveness of yourself). Open your heart and let the grief out so love of all kinds can flow back in. Even if the loss feels completely unjust. It isn't about what happened in the past. It's about love of all kinds that is all around you, waiting for you to let go of what was and embrace what is.
Unforgiveness of yourself or another will only become a roadblock to love in the future. It doesn't matter what happened. It doesn't matter what THEY did or what YOU did. It only matters what you do with the lesson. All lessons on earth are about love. Love is always in the forever present. No matter how much it may change, there is always a choice to be made to give love or withhold it. Give as much love away as you can, but be sure to give it to yourself first. Forgiveness of another or of yourself is sometimes the most important way to give love to yourself. Forgive. Release. Love.